Can you even spell individual?

Before I even start, I would like to make one thing clear. Out of about 10 writers and two editors besides myself at Life Desk, I am the only male. This has not influenced my motivation to write this (whether you can believe that or not).

As idealistic and/or impossible of a concept as this may seem to be, I believe in the right for individuals to express themselves as they see fit. No seriously, I really do. I believe that people all grow in a certain way as a result of society's influence. It's the same values imposed upon our parents, and their parents before that. That being said, I question the very concept of individualism in this world.

Stereotypes create the ability to put easy answers to difficult questions. It takes what we are unsure of, or disassociated with, and gives it some sort of simple title. The image of the feminist is just like how any other stereotype goes. It has its slang terms and assumptions that stick anybody remotely associated with the cause into one category.

Here in the 21st century, you might believe "we" have come a long way as far as human rights go: for the most part you're probably correct. There still (and will for a long time) remains a certain handicap for people to express themselves willingly, especially when that expression is coupled with a violation of what has been deemed "normal" (dramatic gasp).

For we are a product of a whole, and somewhere along the line, we've become what somebody else expects us to be. Even in present day, you could scream at the top of your lungs that you are free to go about your choosing, and you are an individual pursuing whatever it is that strikes you as interesting. You ought to recognize though that the limitations in expression are still very much present.

My inspiration for these words came about a week or two ago when my senior editor Stephanie received a press release about a women's self-defense campaign that Oxygen Network and Time Warner Cable teamed up to lead. They have so "cleverly" named their campaign 'Fight like a Girl'.

This got me thinking. I said to myself, is this supposed to be ironic or something. Here we have a women's network indirectly promoting an already rampant stereotype that causes women to be associated with weakness. Allow me to explain myself further though. I absolutely advocate awareness of self-defense techniques, which goes for everyone, not just women. In reality, what does being a woman have anything to do with it?

There are certainly men who don't know how to fight, and you full well know if they can't, and if they lose, they will never hear the end of it. They will be called a "bitch" or a "pussy," which leads me to my next point: the worst things you can call a girl or a guy.

This concept is borrowed from author named Jessica Valenti, writer of "Full Frontal Feminism". She goes on to talk about the worst thing you can call a girl, and then goes on to outline what are the worst things you can call a guy. The verdict is (drum roll please), that the worst things you can call a girl like "bitch" are synonymous to the worst things you can call a guy. When derogatory female terms are used for both genders, these adjectives previously reserved to describe women are one and the same with weakness.

Now back to this 'Fight like a Girl' campaign. I agree that allocating money to have people trained in the art of self-defense is extremely important, but it is perhaps slightly more important to arm people with the power of knowledge. Sure, learning how to defend yourself is a decent way to adapt and overcome violence in the short run, but what about the bigger problem: the problem that's probably not going to disappear anytime soon unless people act out on it.

What if everybody knew self-defense? Not only would everybody be prepared for a violent situation, but people also would be using violence to breed more violence. Where is the line drawn between where physical power overrides the importance and power of intelligence and awareness?

In an except from Valenti's book, she states "the largest hurdle to activism is finding commonalities with one another so that we share the common goal of ending all discrimination and create a world where we are not treated but also regarded as equal."

One of the most important balances that will need to be implemented is the balance between individual desire to express, and upholding social responsibility. If a girl walked into a room wearing dress pants, this would be fine according to today's standards. Try having a guy walk into a room wearing a prom dress, and they would either be laughed at or severely looked down upon with disgust and contempt.

I'm not fighting for the fact that men should be allowed to wear dresses, not in the least. I am fighting for you to recognize what outstanding differences society has built between men and women. No matter how far we think we have gotten in terms of gender equality, "we" as a whole will forever be stuck in a perpetual standstill until either the individual learns to break the chains that bind them to the gender norms, or society starts to become a little more forgiving of true individualism.