Table for one

Have you ever noticed that whenever someone asks you if you are seeing someone and you say no, they immediately pity you?

Their face changes in this absurd way that portrays disappointment and shame all at the same time and you instinctively feel the need to defend yourself after this facial assault.

So you say things like, "I'm just too busy for a relationship," "I'm focusing on me right now" or my favorite, "I'm kind of a commitment-phobe."

But if you say yes, glee immediately enters their eyeballs because now you can share stories about how much you love your other half and how you both totally hate it when he or she farts in bed.

I'm not really sure which part makes me sicker: the whole pity thing or that the person you are talking to has nothing better to converse about except their partner's flatulence and other annoying qualities.

It's not that being in a relationship is bad; we are all looking for someone to grow old with, eventually.

The thing that bothers me the most is the singles vs. the paired. And the singles always get the shortest straw.

Singles are seen as flawed, which makes many run out into the world to find someone, anyone, to fill their time, sleep in their bed, and make them into a duet instead of a solo.

But those of us that persevere and stand strong on our single ground get ridiculed and looked down on for having standards and not settling for the first guy to make us giggle.

Doubles feel the need to make singles duplicate by setting them up with friends, who are usually either completely unfortunate in so many ways, or once you are actually on this so-called date, he doesn't actually understand the terms and conditions of conversation.

So this year on the holiday meant to make every single person feel insecure, officially known as Valentine's Day, I am taking charge and taking myself to Manhattan to enjoy V-day in a whole new way.

Valentines Day for singles usually consists of either a lot of alcohol, double fudge brownie sundaes, or Celine Dion and tears.

But this year the day meant to force lovers to show appreciation for each other is going to be spent enjoying a fabulous city, in a truly Carrie Bradshaw-esque way, in overpriced shoes and with one of the best single girls I know.

And so the moral of the story is that Valentine's Day is one day out of 365. It gives many an excuse to be overly affectionate and do something completely out of the ordinary. This shouldn't be different for those who haven't quite met Mr. Right.

Tell your mom you love her, give your dog a kiss that would gross out anyone watching, and take the opportunity to love yourself and maybe do something a little crazy instead of spending the night with Ben, Jerry, and Jose Cuervo.