The University at Buffalo has recently taken progressive action to combat the straining budget and economic crisis.
President John B. Simpson addressed the issue at a news conference Monday afternoon and to comment on the university's hirings of Bernard Madoff, ex-CEO of Bernard L. Madoff Securities LLC, and Jeffery Skillinggs, former CEO of Enron Corporation.
"Tough economic times are ahead, the board of trustees and I believe action must be taken to continue the development of our university. These great business minds will be able to create and execute solutions to the financial problems that have hit us hard recently," said Simpson.
Simpson then discussed the details of the disgraced duo's current positions with the University; the goal is to bring in the bright minds to form a "brain trust" in this economic climate. Unfortunately, Madoff and Skilling couldn't attend the press conference because they were already working hard to find a solution to the crisis.
Both will be able to work long hours due to their accommodations, which are in close proximity to campus. Attica Correctional Facility has provided its must luxurious executive suites to both men.
Sadly, the work place has all the enmities of a downtown Wall Street office. However, the wireless Internet and fine catered cuisine will be paid for by the state of New York.
Simpson quickly dismissed concerns over the criminal pats of each man. Madoff pled guilty to an 11-count criminal complaint of investor fraud close to $65 Billion dollars earlier this year. As for Skilling's run in with the law, he was indicted on 35 counts of fraud and insider trading of $60 million and other crimes resulting in the failure of Enron.
Madoff, widely praised for his work in the field of asset management, will now be the in charge of the university's endowment, which has already taken substantial loss. Given credit for creating the NASDAQ, Madoff is ready for the chance to prove his genius of Wall Street in the benefit of a public institution.
"I am eternally grateful for the judge allowing to serve my sentence by doing community service and helping manage assets for a remarkable institution," Madoff said. "I have no doubt that I will be able to create vast new pools of wealth for the University at Buffalo to continue to grow and flourish."
Estimates of the return on UB's endowment with Madoff at the helm range from $50 billion to $64.8 billion over the course of his tenure. The timing couldn't be better considering the state's tightening of the fiscal belt around the SUNY system.
Madoff's statement further reassures the student population not to worry about the recent swings of the financial markets.
"Take my word for it, for the most part you can ignore those recent moves, I don't like to see this type of activity. Eventually, if this bubble bursts, I think that people will be left holding the bag. I don't want to be around when that happens. Whoops, the bubble did burst. We are fine," Madoff said.
Skillings' job skills, acquired with the Enron Corporation, will also be put to good use in helping the University reform its policies regarding electricity, natural gas, paper and communications.
"Cutting these utility prices will not only save the university money, but we will be able to put those resources to use for the students," Simpson said." Our goal is to not only provide students with valuable services but give back to the community as well."
Like Madoff, Skilling wasn't at the press conference because he was already taking a tour of UB's facilities. Simpson did read a small prepared statement on behalf of Skilling.
"Sadly, no one really understands the complexity of these costs for the university if we can mitigate them we can provide new services for the community. It's really a question of figuring out what makes sense," Skilling's statement read.
Skilling estimates that around $60 million can be saved from the current costs. Some of the new strategy will have UB whole-selling its extra supplies of natural gas and energy back to Erie County.
"By selling back the units in big block shares, it will allow us to divert money into other cost efficient energy solutions. And with rising natural gas prices the sky is the limit to channel, I mean divert funds into accounts that can't be taxed," said Skilling.
Skillings statement further explains that his predecessors have acted with rather vague knowledge of the current situation.
"If they are covering their asses and it's costing us a lot of money, I am not going to be happy. I'm worried we are missing out. You know that the market is skyrocketing right now we can make a killing in energy. I know a great auditing firm of Arthur Anderson to keep money out of the states greedy coffers," Skilling said.
Weekly fireside chats with Simpson will be broadcast on the university's MyUB home page allowing weekly updates on the status of the university. The goal is to reassure and show the students and facility the administration is being proactive in solving the school's budget crisis.
"Alleviating the concerns of everyone involved with our school is first and foremost on my mind. History will show action and decisiveness in the face of financial hardship, B-dubs and J-dubs will be able to work many long nights to save us money," said Simpson.
Madoff and Skilling will not be receiving payment for their services due to certain stipulations in their contracts. Both men feel honored to be part of such prestigious research institution.
Simpson may have another ace of his sleeve in cutting UB expenditure.
"All I can say we are in talks with AIG to provide the student body with lower cost healthcare to supplant the current coverage we have in place. Every possibility and option will be carefully reviewed by myself and the brain trust," said Simpson.
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