The search for love is a difficult one - the search for a normal date can be even harder. Whether you have a hard time meeting members of the opposite sex, or an even trickier time gauging their intentions, the Internet now gives people the chance to preview potential dates - and students are logging on more and more.
For a change, I'll have a Valentine this coming Thursday, but I'm no stranger to the usual stress, heartache and ridiculousness that can entail making a good match with a potential partner. While online dating has a certain stigma attached to it, there's little shame in it compared to the awkward blind dates and set-ups with friends the single endure. If you're planning on being sad about your single status this week, online dating might be worth a try.
Only for the lonely, The Spectrum brings you recommendations for the world of finding your dot.com prince or princess, and what to do to take your relationship from cyberspace into reality.
In creating a profile, I specified that my potential aficionado needs to be taller than I am, not married and not a smoker. Other that that, I tried to keep an open mind.
Surprisingly, I found a fair amount of UB students on each Web site - even some Spectrum editors. If you're still looking for lovin' this Valentine's Day, the site you pick could very well determine the direction in which Cupid's arrow sails.
Plentyoffish.com
An obvious perk: it's free! Unlike Match.com and Eharmony.com, there is no cost to join. However, there are also fewer members. The site is growing in popularity among college students though, and I was able to find some decent-looking, somewhat normal-acting locals. The site also hosts a large number of Canadians.
There's no long-winded registration form - just a few questions and then blank space to say what you want.
Another cool perk: I made a connection instantly - literally, whilst I completed the questionnaire, I received an instant message from another member. The bad news is that one of the first things he said, before even knowing my name, was to announce that (even though I'm Roman Catholic and he's Lutheran) "we worship the same Jesus."
Nice intro, buddy.
The next one told me that he went to medical school in Pakistan - a little weird, for an opening line.
After meeting a few oddballs, a few nice guys actually made contact. The site is nice for students, because there are a lot of other undergrads there. But beware of high schoolers.
Match.com and Eharmony.com
If you're into astrology, Match or Eharmony might work for you. One of their very first questions was my sign (Scorpio). You have a lot of open space to describe yourself, so if you're not the most articulate person, skip it. The profile portion also takes a fair amount of time to complete, which will benefit those who have a lot to say. This isn't one of those sites where words are everything - you definitely get more attention for putting a picture up.
Despite being given the chance to specify an age limit, men outside of your age range will hit on you - particularly, old men say they can offer you a world of financial freedom.
Aside from that, beware of Eharmony's incredibly long, multiple-choice compatibility test.
I wasn't ready to commit some $30 for a month of love seeking on the site, but I was still able to contact other members who subtly managed to slide their screen names or e-mail addresses into their profiles.
The major benefit is that you can choose to only go through profiles with pictures attached. If you find an undesirable one, you can quickly move on. The site is geared more towards adults, less towards a younger generation. Area students and grads are out there, but you have to do a little digging.
Adultfriendfinder.com
Don't count on finding anything more than a hookup here. I've heard of relationships spurring from these sites, but AdultFriendFinder is generally geared towards sexual interests, not personality.
The site is also a little sketchy, depending on how into it you get. You'll also get the typical middle to retirement-aged man hitting on you, despite your profile clearly noting your "barely legal" status.
Should you decide to meet, choose a public place to meet before committing to a hookup, as you might change your mind or stumble upon someone who wasn't completely truthful.
Don't bother signing up if you're easily offended, or don't want to get a few pics from those who feel the need to show off their goods.
Moreover, it isn't one of those sites where you're fairly safe putting a picture up - having a boss, co-worker or friend finding your smiling mug on this site might cause a bit more controversy for you than with other services.
The plus is, a lot of students use it - and a lot of people in the Buffalo area. In fact, it's one of the most popular Web sites used in the US. Plus, you do get a quick response...especially if you're young.
While you might not find ever-lasting love on AdultFriendFinder, you might find someone to distract you from your Valentine's Day blues.
Warning: May inspire you to feel the need to shower and/or say the Rosary.
Craigslist
It's a great site to sell or buy things, get a job, or find a date. Lots of single guys and gals use the service, but most don't have pictures with their profiles, unlike the other sites.
Everything on the site, including the match service, is free, which is a perk for students. You can write as much or as little as you want. Plus, you don't always have to log into the site to get new messages or make new contacts; you can use your regular e-mail.
The con is that there's no way to filter age, race or what the other person is looking for. The whole thing is a little sketchy, but worth a try if you are looking to go about meeting someone casually.
Ready to meet?
Once you actually find someone you are compatible with on one of these sites, it's important to court as you normally would, had you met in class or through friends. Being respectful and polite are still expected of the guys, whereas girls should keep their class intact and not come off as over eager.
Don't keep your pending relationship on the online plane for too long. Exchanging phone calls, texts, Facebook friendships and even snail mail can spark a deeper romance.
Should you agree to meet, do it in a public place to ensure safety. Look nice and be courteous and punctual, because first impressions are everything. Above all, make sure to choose a first encounter activity that you'll both enjoy, because a first date can set the tone for future sparks to fly.
