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Wednesday, May 01, 2024
The independent student publication of The University at Buffalo, since 1950

An Open Letter to Attractive Classmates

Hey there.

You're looking pretty damn good. But you know what? I've met people like you before. In fact, you're pretty ordinary.

We've all had this experience: step foot in class the first day, sit down, scan the room, and boom! Attractive classmate spotted. And as soon as I spot you, I see you've spotted me.

I guess you could say I'm "noticing you, noticing me." It's going to be a fun semester.

Stop right there. Glance down at your notes and think about what we're about to get into. This is an adventure unlike any other. This kind of love affair – the continuous glances, the furious eye contact, and the intermittent smile – lasts all semester. It's a relationship that can't be taken too lightly.

But as soon as I think through the whole situation and decide it's a bad idea, your audacious blue eyes have met mine yet again.

It's been determined. This impervious "I look at you/you look at me" practice will repeat itself three times a week until the final exam – except those days you skip class. Those are the worst days.

I'm not one of those guys who'll just walk up after class and say "how you doin'?" while unleashing a flawless white smile, unveiling irresistible dimples, and sending a chorus of angels into a rousing rendition of "You Make My Dreams Come True" as you swoon over my charisma.

At the same time, I'm not the kind of guy who'll just sit across from you in class and stare at you the whole time. Nah, that's just weird. So I'll take meticulous notes, pay attention in class (for the most part), and just ever so rarely pretend to look at the window and happen to see you.

Pick-up lines just aren't my style, but you understand. Whatever my style is, you like it, and I like yours. You hate getting hit on by the random guys in our class anyway.

Does that mean I don't have balls? Maybe it does. Does it make me creepy? No, solely because this admiration is mutual.

You forgive my timidity and I forgive yours. Like my blue sweater? I thought of you as I picked it out this morning. What's that? Yeah, I like your shoes.

We may never speak. In fact, we probably never will. Maybe along the line one of us will work up the courage to add the other on Facebook. (Okay, we've all checked Facebook for a good-looking classmate before. Most of us have even listened for that person's name during attendance. Stop judging me.) I wouldn't bank on it, though. We'll probably never have serious contact outside of class.

Time goes by pretty quickly when you're seeing someone. Ever started dating someone, and then before you know it, you two have been dating for six months? It feels our affair only lasted a week as I see you walk up and hand in your final exam.

What the hell? This isn't fair. It'll be a long, difficult summer without you around. I'll see you walking around campus with your friends from time to time in the future. You'll look happy. You know, I'm glad you moved on. You deserve the best, and I'll bet there's a new guy in one of your classes now.

I'm just not sure I'll ever get over you.

That is, until I step into my first class of fall semester, sit down, scan the room, and boom! A new set of eyes connects with mine.

Hey there.

Email: aaron.mansfield@ubspectrum.com


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