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Saturday, April 20, 2024
The independent student publication of The University at Buffalo, since 1950

The Carter XVI

Denard Robinson is one of the most exciting college football players to come along in the past decade.

But is that actually Dwayne Carter (Lil' Wayne) wearing that No.16 Michigan jersey every weekend? It's hard to tell.

We all know that Carter is in jail until November on weapons charges, but I'm convinced that he is playing football for the Wolverines this season, because celebrities don't actually go to jail.

And this theory I have goes much deeper than the similar dreadlock look that both of these men sport.

If you have listened to Carter's music, you've noticed that the only thing he raps about more than drugs and his female companions is sports.

Lines such as "Tony Romo / No homo" and "Tiger Woods on these holes, trying to birdie these balls" are examples of Carter's love for sports.

Carter has had a featured blog on ESPN.com and has been a guest on multiple shows on ESPN, such as Around the Horn.

But in his recent single, titled "Right Above It," Carter makes a reference to the wildcat offense that I just can't get out of my head.

"Ball on automatic start / I could hand it off to Drake or do a quarterback draw / wildcat offense, check the paw prints."

There is not a better spread offense in college football than Michigan's this season, making their quarterback "Robinson" the best prospect for running the wildcat formation in the NFL.

There have been many athletes who have attempted to make a name in the hip-hop industry. Kobe Bryant has been known for his lyrical abilities, even rapping in different languages. And Shaquille O'Neal was at the forefront of controversy for his freestyle Kobe-diss at a hip-hop club.

Ron Artest even released an album during the season when he was suspended for the famous brawl in Auburn Hills, Mich. Artest also has a track featured on NBA 2K11.

There have also been some musicians that have taken their athletic abilities to the playing field. Have you ever seen Nelly play in a celebrity basketball or flag football event? The guy can ball.

Drake, Carter's right-hand man, says it best in his song "Thank Me Now," rapping, "Damn, I swear sports and music are so synonymous / Cause we want to be them, and they want to be us."

Since so many guys have attempted to be successful in both music and sports, who's to say that Dwayne Carter couldn't be the one to pull it off?

The guy is on fire in the music industry, producing hits from his "jail cell." Smoking weed might be the only thing preventing him from being successful on the football field. However, being in prison might be the best thing for his lungs. They normally don't let prisoners do drugs. Key word: normally.

Carter recently was placed in solitary confinement for having an illegal MP3 player, forcing him to spend 23 hours of the day in his cell. Or is that just a cover-up so that he can practice and play with the Wolverines on Saturdays?

Maybe Wayne cleaned up his act and found a name for himself in football. But that name isn't Dwayne Carter.

I'm just waiting for the day when the ESPN bottom line has breaking news stating that Robinson has finally revealed himself as the superstar rapper that I think he is.

I know I'm probably wrong; it wouldn't be the first time. But I just want people to know that they heard it here first.

E-mail: chris.rahn@ubspectrum.com


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