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Friday, March 29, 2024
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Machete hacks through the awesome

Grade: A-

In a time of remakes and sequels, Machete is one flick that cuts through the crap in order to produce a genuine and original film that doesn't disappoint.

Based on the three-minute trailer from 2007's Grindhouse, Machete is the full-feature film that Robert Rodriguez (Shorts) fans have anxiously been awaiting.

From beginning to end, Machete is a fast-paced, blood-drenched ride that can be described as nothing short of amazing. The film is pure fun through and through.

One of the most appealing aspects of Machete is the film's gear toward comedy in addition to its explosions and decapitations. Throughout its duration, Rodriguez's comedic dialogue will make you spout out gut-bursting laughs while dropping your jaw in shock due to an over-the-top limb severing.

Another draw of the film is its clear point to be insincere – at no point does Machete take itself seriously.

After his family is brutally murdered by a ruthless drug lord named Torrez (Steven Seagal, A Dangerous Man), Machete (Danny Trejo, Predators) makes his way to Texas where he survives as a day-to-day labor hand for hire.

Machete is approached by Booth (Jeff Fahey, The Miraculous Tale of the Children Dubois), a man who convinces him to assassinate Senator McLaughin (Robert De Niro, Everybody's Fine) for $150,000. Things soon go south when Machete is set up and left for dead.

What follows is a whirlwind of sex, death and explosions.

Machete could have been a total disaster due to the sheer ridiculousness of the film. It's excessive in its action, acting and bloodshed, yet that is what makes it so good. The blood is plentiful and gruesome deaths are abound in Rodriguez's latest masterpiece.

The only thing better than Machete's hack and slash action is its cast. From

Jessica Alba (Valentine's Day) to Cheech Marin (The Perfect Game), the movie

seems to have just about every recent Hollywood star in it.

Marin's performance as an ex-Federale turned priest is exceptionally well done. It's nearly impossible not to fall in love with the character and his boyish

charm. He fills the movie with a healthy helping of laughs, as well as large

amounts of ass kicking.

Lindsay Lohan (Labor Pains) plays the role of Booth's spoiled and drug addicted daughter who isn't afraid to bare it all for her Internet fans. Maybe it's

because of her real world experiences, but Lohan actually pulls off the role

quite well.

Machete won't be a fan favorite for everyone. The movie is either hit or miss depending on your taste in film. Moviegoers will either love the film's style or walk out of the theater wanting their money back.

If you can accept the film for the gory and action-packed comedy that it intends to be, then Machete may just be the most fun you've had at the movies in years.


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