The day of romance has come and gone, and my bank account is well on its way to being gone as well. This Valentines Day I promised my girlfriend that I would make it as fantastic and romantic as possible.
To do that I needed to plan a date that would not only woo my girlfriend but her friends when she calls them the next day.
I decided the only way to make this happen would be to go over the top and do the dinner, flowers, and candy thing. I woke up on Valentines Day motivated to accomplish the feat of being the most romantic valentine in Buffalo- according to the friends of my girlfriend.
My campaign of domination included spending money that I really didn't have in an effort to be the ultimate man. My plan hit an early snag upon waking up Wednesday with my car under a foot of snow.
But no snowstorm was going to slow me down and my dedication remained strong as I feverishly shoveled the snow blocking my car. After an hour I cruised from the formerly blockaded spot and was on the road. My next stop was Niagara Falls and the outlet center for the ultimate girl gift.
The monster that stood ahead of me was the Coach store.
The Coach store and I go back a couple of girlfriends, and it would be accurate to say we don't have a great past. I learned in an early relationship that women love purses and the Coach store is considered the purse palace. However, even entering the store as a man can be a daunting and wallet-burning task.
I knew heading into Valentines Day, my nemesis of purses would attempt to hurt my budget. I made the trip to Niagara Falls because the Coach store I was entering was supposed to be an outlet, and I was hoping to find a cheap one hundred dollar bag.
The first battle in the war with Coach or any other women's store begins at the doorway when that one smiley salesperson asks, "Can I help you find something?"
For a guy on a budget these words make you cringe immediately because you know that the smiley lady is going try and sell the most expensive item in the store.
I greeted those words with angst and did what most men do and replied, "I'm all set, thank you."
But I really wasn't all set, and after pretending like I knew my way around the wristlets I cracked, I asked for help.
I was forced to suck up my manhood and play the role of a typical male attempting to shop at the last minute. Of course the smiley woman gave me the typical chuckle when lecturing me on exactly what I needed to get my girlfriend. She threw in her own suggestions on what to buy, including the three hundred dollar new line of bags.
The women continued on with her story discussing all the men she had helped on Valentine's Day and how my girlfriend was lucky to have a "man like me".
To be honest with you I didn't give a crap on what the smiley lady thought and was wondering why this Coach purse would solidify my relationship. But I buckled and purchased a purse, which was over the original budget.
Driving in the horrible weather on the ride home I came to the conclusion I hate entering stores like Coach mostly because they guilt men into buying over-priced products. The only reason women love the purses is because of the brand name and social identity you receive when wearing one.
I cannot think of any product that men drool over and wear because of what other guys think. Most women constantly think that they need to impress each other with accessories such as purses and boots.
To be the perfect boyfriend in the eyes of women across society I was guilted into buying my girlfriend a product that would impress other women. I still had hope that the gift I would receive would be just as clich?(c) as mine.
I thought about the Sabres vs. Devils game coming up or maybe that iPod I had been talking about buying.
My gift and every man's dream.
A beta fish.
