This summer I moved into my fraternity house with three thoughts in mind. Parties, parties, and more parties. So last Friday, our fine organization, which will continue to go unnamed because of the vindictive nature of a malicious Gestapo unit, otherwise known as the Buffalo Police Force, set out to kick the year off with a bang. We stocked up on an array of delicious cold beverages and set up good clean fun events such as a wet T-shirt contest and various games of beer pong.
The party was rocking, girls were grooving and I was all set to get my swerve on, all before midnight. What happened next was the biggest buzz-kill since, well, non-alcoholic beer. Two cops stormed the party, despite the fact that our house is soundproof, we kept the music off outside and most of our neighbors were attending the party anyway.
Director of University Police John Grela said, "Usually if the party is not out of hand, with people urinating in the street or puking in the driveway, cops usually drive by." Since the cops came at 11:45, no one had reached that point yet.
No, the only thing we were doing wrong was serving alcohol to poor innocent underage minors who can die for our country but are unable to engage in the social activity of drinking a frosty cold beverage. But that is a different article for a different day.
If the cops were really concerned about the well-being of minors, then their actions would have been honorable. If they were merely doing their jobs, there would be honor in that too. However, that raises the question, why not bust other establishments that serve minors? So, I asked the officer in a polite tone of voice, "Why not take a trip down Main Street if you want to see underage people being served alcohol?" His response: "Mind your own f-ing business, unless you want to go to jail." First of all, I was deeply hurt by his rough abrasive manner (actually I couldn't give a s-t). But that only prompts the next question. What do these establishments have that we don't? Money.
That's right folks, the fix is in. The bars are paying off the cops to blow up our fraternity parties to promote more business and clientele for them. How does this affect your average everyday John and Jane Freshmen? Well, instead of paying $4 to drink all night, you are now paying $4 for a bottle of beer.
While PJ's is a fine tavern that I frequent fairly often, your list of things to do on Friday night will be narrowed down to PJ's and 3rd Base, who are attempting to monopolize the greater Main Street area. Can I prove it? University Police Director John Grela offered definitive proof that something was not quite right in Dodge:
"The bar owners have said they will call the police themselves. They feel they are getting a bad rap with all the things that have been going on down there. They feel that they provide a safe place, and don't let kids get drunk because they are supervised and supposedly don't serve underage kids."
Yeah, and I just saw Elvis walking into the Undergraduate Library. These bar owners are interested in one thing. The George Washingtons that we will be throwing their way as they attack our quality of life with greedy, exploitative and dirty politics that are threatening our university's rapid growth and development.
Take a look around you. Did you see the 22,658 people and over 6,000 students that packed UB Stadium for the Bulls football opener against Rutgers? That prompted Coach Jim Hofher to send a thank you note to the student body for the record-breaking attendance. Have you been to the Union or the gym at peak hours? Try getting a table or a bench. This proves two things. First of all, we need bigger facilities. More importantly, the age of apathy that has plagued our school is coming to an end.
The rejuvenation of Greek life also coincides with the strengthening of our student body. President Greiner's mid-western dream is becoming a reality. Look at the state universities we are most trying to emulate - Ohio State, Michigan, Penn State. Greek life is prevalent and a vital component of campus life, and you see their presence at every fundraiser, every athletic event, perhaps most importantly, every party.
While parties may not be the backbone of Greek life, they are certainly a major organ. They serve as a place for underclassmen to meet and mingle at an affordable rate for a poor college student. Also, they serve as a major fundraiser for us to keep our organizations intact and enable us to participate in various philanthropic events such as Kids' Day and Adopt-a-Child.
As for the bars' claim that they look out more for their clientele, it is pretty easy for them to pay for a couple of taxis when they're sucking all the monetary value out of students.
Certainly, I have a vested interest in this subject, but so should anyone else who likes the idea of cheap beer, good times and good parties. As it stands now with the bars snitching and trying to get us thrown in jail for the same stuff they're doing - serving minors - we may all be sentenced to a year at the rat-infested PJ Bottoms.
