Comme des Carson - Mend your mainstream mistakes
Nov. 24, 2013Editor's note: This article is satirical and is not meant to be taken literally. Dear Carson, I'm in love.
Editor's note: This article is satirical and is not meant to be taken literally. Dear Carson, I'm in love.
After reading the Spectrum article entitled "College democrats seek open-minded discussion rather than debate," I was delighted to have the opportunity to engage in respectful and civil discussion with my fellow peers on Planned Parenthood's services.
What he was, he was: What he is fated to become Depends on us.
For over three decades, Chinese couples have had to endure a strict and unreasonable one-child policy - facing the risk of huge fines and capricious levels of harassment from authorities if they violate this rule. It was in 1980 that China's Communist Party's leaders enacted this policy into law to address the issue of overpopulation.
The holidays are finally upon us. There's no denying it anymore; they've come right through the door and smacked us in the face.
Charles Dickens once said: "I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year." Of course, this notion extends beyond Christmas to all of the holidays many celebrate this time of year - Hanukkah, Kwanza and everything else. It is the holiday spirit that Mr. Dickens was speaking about, and that comes from a communal atmosphere.
You know what they say - when in Rome, do as the Romans do. But when you're in Russia, you need to do as the Russians do.
In light of Malcolm Gladwell's recent visit to UB, now is a time to question football's role within collegiate institutions.
In a month, American Airlines will be the largest airline in the world. After months of hurdles and complications, the Justice Department announced on Tuesday that it approved the merger of American Airlines and US Airways after a settlement was reached. The settlement involves the newly established airline to give up an array of spaces at various airports in order to ensure enough competition in the airline industry to keep fares down. But let there be no mistake about it: Such a stipulation is not satisfactory in attempting to alleviate the probable consequences of there only being four major airline carriers in the United States. This consolidation will cause 80 percent of all domestic-travel business to come out of three airlines - leaving no room for competition from smaller companies and will inevitably allow cushion for these major airlines to keep prices high. Without substantial competition, incentive to keep prices low diminishes.
Editor's note: This article is satirical and is not meant to be taken literally. Dear Carson, As the resident hipster at The Spectrum, you are the omniscient presence that guides a massive readership into the realm of new-wave original swag, holding our hands in unity in a band of defiance before the mainstream with a PBR-can wizard staff the size of Gandalf's member - do you get offended when someone else tries to take on that role?
Students being robbed at gunpoint - some being burglarized inside their homes; innumerable housing violations; the University Police not having jurisdiction to patrol the neighborhood; scores of students and community members distraught over the university not doing enough to combat horrid living conditions. These are just some of the stories media outlets in Buffalo should be paying attention to regarding the University Heights neighborhood.
On Nov. 1, Paul A. Ciancia walked into the Los Angeles International Airport with an assault rifle and opened fire.
In a recent opinion piece in The New York Times, Sandy Baum, an economist at George Washington University, Kristin Conklin, a founding partner in HCM Strategists, and Nate Johnson, a consultant at Postsecondary Analytics, address the problems regarding federal Pell Grants. In "Stop Penalizing Poor College Students," they write: "The problem is that the program provides support for only 12 credit hours per term, which the government defines as full time for financial aid purposes." It is certainly true that this makes it more difficult for recipients of Pell Grants to graduate in four years.
A perfect day for Malcolm Gladwell is one in which he does not say a word to anyone until after dinner.
Two weeks ago, when Jonathan Martin left the Miami Dolphins for reasons due to emotional distress, many people jumped to conclusions.
It was just over a year ago that America saw the damage caused to the Mid-Atlantic coastal states by Hurricane Sandy.
As the Obama administration continues to face intense criticism over the rollout of the Affordable Care Act, now is an important time to remember the purpose behind health care reform. There is no denying, though, that the president was wrong to misrepresent how implementation of the ACA would affect all consumers.
Last Tuesday, New York voters made a mistake by passing a referendum allowing seven private casinos to be added throughout the state.
Everything that was expected to happen on Tuesday did. Chris Christie won for reelection handily in New Jersey; Terry McAuliffe edged off Kenneth Cuccinelli II narrowly in Virginia; and, for the first time in 20 years, a Democrat will be the mayor of New York City with Bill de Blasio's landslide electoral victory. So what does this all mean? Regardless of how premature it is for commentators and strategists to speculate on the 2016 presidential elections this early, we all do it.
On Tuesday night, the UB football team faced one of its biggest games in years. With a national audience watching on ESPN2 and expectations as high as they've ever been, the Bulls came through - they won by 27 points. As Buffalo football continues to labor toward its ultimate goal, a MAC championship, what has been a constant this season, more so than in the past, is the sustained and spirited support of its fans.