As I sat on the frozen seats of Heinz Field, ecstatic to attend my first game in Pittsburgh, my mood darkened.
It was quarterback Ben Roethlisberger’s last game in the 412, and I wasn’t mentally prepared.
I could barely handle it when the stadium erupted into applause as a yellow sea of Terrible Towels and fans screaming “thank you Ben” overlayed the infamous “Renegade” by Styx.
Anger coursed through my blood as the feminist in me couldn’t help but feel guilty for supporting a team that allowed an accused rapist to lead them to 15 consecutive winning seasons.
I am so sick of teams putting wins before morality. How can you call someone like Ben Roethlisberger a “hero” or a “legend?”
Roethlisberger was accused of sexual assault in 2008 and 2012 yet still enjoyed a mostly positive reputation thanks to his Hall of Fame-worthy statistics. But, his stats aren’t what we should care about.
How and why did we let this man go from an accused rapist to a football icon? Why did we let his past vanish to enable his rise to stardom?
More importantly, why do we keep allowing this to happen in every area of professional sports?
NBA icon Kobe Bryant allegedly raped a 19-year-old girl back in 2003. Her blood was found on him and there was a warrant out for his arrest, yet he was able to convince the media he was innocent based in part to the talent he brought to the court. Due to harassment and threats, the victim decided not to go through with the case, but that doesn’t mean a jury exonerated Kobe of his charges. When I decided to post about this contradiction on Instagram, I received a lovely DM:
“Think fore you post some dumb ass s—t like this” [sic].
As if this is a “dumb” situation.
As if I was making it up.
NHL all-star Patrick Kane, a Buffalo native, was accused of rape back in 2015 by a woman he had met at a nightclub. Nothing came out of that because the judge claimed there was reasonable doubt and that Kane “never acted like a guilty man.” The New York state trial judge also canceled the grand jury presentation of evidence, meaning neither side had the opportunity to present their arguments with proof. Kane says he “never did anything wrong.”
Every time I hear someone praise an athlete accused of assault, I feel my teeth chatter and my temperature rise. I bite my tongue to avoid the backlash that will inevitably come if I open my mouth.
But I’m done being quiet. It’s time to start holding athletes accountable for what they do outside of the stadium.
Sadly, more often than not, these cases reflect a “he said, she said” scenario, and all too often the woman’s statement is undervalued, the man is believed and the woman is attacked by internet trolls who claim she is making up her allegations to “ruin his career” or “steal his hard-earned money.”
Why is it so hard for people to accept that these athletes are capable of such heinous acts when, according to the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network, an American is raped every 68 seconds?
I’m tired of victim-blaming. In no way, shape or form are women (or men) doing anything that would warrant being raped. Step into the victim’s shoes for one minute and think about the trauma that was inflicted upon them.
What if that was your mother, sister, daughter or niece?
I am sick of hearing the inhumane actions that are unwillingly forced upon women, and I am fed up with the way the media refers to these survivors.
Why are the women referred to as accusers, and not victims or survivors? Why is the perpetrator only noted as an athlete? The “accuser” phrasing unconsciously puts this notion of doubt in our mind, leading to toxic and inconsiderate media portrayal that undoubtedly enhances rape culture and deters women from reporting.
Studies — in research journals ranging from the Journal of Criminal Justice to the Journal of Sports and Social Issues — have shown that male athletes tend to be more aggressive than their non-athlete peers, and male socialization does not help counter that. On average, men are socialized to be more aggressive, competitive and to withhold weakness.
Sports such as football and hockey are known for vigorous behavior by athletes during the game. Those who participate in such athletic endeavors are at greater risk for concussions, and repeated head trauma quite literally changes the way an athlete’s brain works.
Despite this knowledge, professional organizations don’t have the adequate measures in place to help or discipline these athletes, which results in a cycle of misbehavior and violence, usually directed at women.
As a survivor, it hurts like hell to see men get away with their violent actions time and time again due to their athletic talent. We shouldn’t care if the perpetrator has two Super Bowl rings, five NBA titles or three Stanley Cups.
Your accomplishments do not equal entitlement, and they certainly do not equate to consent. We must stop forcing the narrative that “boys will be boys.”
Stop setting the precedent that your actions do not matter as long as you’re an athlete. Teach men to be respectful.
Believe women, and stand with them. #MeToo
Kayla Sterner is an assistant sports editor and can be reached at kayla.sterner@ubspectrum.com
Kayla Sterner is an assistant sports editor at The Spectrum. She is studying communications with the hopes of being a sideline reporter. In her spare time, she can be found in the gym, watching football or vibing to Mac Miller. Kayla is on Twitter @kaylasterner.
