Bill Maher, the 100th distinguished speaker in the 23-year series, covered a variety of topics Saturday night in Alumni Arena. From calling Sarah Palin a MILF to President Barack Obama a good special education teacher, no subject was left untouched.
The controversial author, comedian and host of HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher, set brutal honesty and crass humor as his objective in his pursuit to entertain a diverse crowd of University at Buffalo students and community members alike.
"Gas is getting so expensive that on Lindsay Lohan's latest sex tape, she is sucking on a siphoning hose. I'm just kidding – it's a dick," Maher said.
Maher has no inhibitions when it comes to criticizing American politicians. His previous talk show, Politically Incorrect, was canceled in 2002 after he referred to the country's position in Iraq as "cowardly."
However, cowardly was certainly not the way he described President Obama, stating that even racists think he's doing a good job.
"I think our ninja president got his mojo back," Maher said. "Bush was white, and he was a moron that made us look bad."
Maher spent time speaking about both the Democrat and Republican parties, denouncing the right but pointing out flaws in the left as well.
"At some point in this country's history, the left moved to the center and the right moved to the mental institution," Maher said.
Calling the right "a bunch of crazy crackers," Maher questioned why Southerners would dress up for Civil War reenactments.
"It's like having a party and inviting all the chicks that ever dumped you," he said.
The political movement of Tea Party conservatives – or Teabaggers, as he referred to them – did not escape Maher's wrath either.
"The founding fathers would have wanted nothing to do with these f**king morons … Little-known fact – George Washington was not into NASCAR," Maher said.
The speaker dove deeper into the inner workings of the government, by explaining politicians' manipulation of their constituents through a comparison between Americans and dogs, emphasizing their keen sense of fear and victory.
"Fear and fake patriotism," Maher said. "You can win an election by saying you love America more than your opponent. I f**ked the flag, does my opponent f**k the flag?"
It wasn't all laughs when Maher took time to question American's trust in the economy.
"This economy is all about … betting against success; it's all about widening the gap between the rich and poor," he said.
Maher continued to explain that while the middle class suffers, the top 1 percent of the population receives tax breaks. He believes a solution to the economic pitfalls lies in taxing the rich.
"There is plenty of money in corporate welfare," he said. "That is the giant lake the [government] needs to tap."
In a time in which Americans are struggling to get by, Maher questioned why taxpayers' money is going toward corporate bailouts.
"Isn't that the great thing about free markets?" Maher said. "If you fail, you fail."
Commenting on the perceived health care revolution, Maher reminded the audience that health insurance is still run by private industries and is ranked only 37th in the world by the United Nations – which is behind Guatemala.
"Where are they getting this sh*t that the U.S. has the greatest health care [in the world]? … Do you know where they are getting it? Grey's Anatomy and House," he said.
Warning the audience that people often walk out when he criticizes religion, Maher wasted no time on calling the Bible a "seriously flawed holy book" and "a book of Jewish fairy tales."
"Why is the purposeful suspension of critical thinking a good thing? … If Mother Theresa thinks it is a crock, then it is like finding out that Colonel Sanders doesn't eat the chicken," Maher said.
The speaker also mocked Mormons, adding that he would not want anyone to baptize him into the Church of Latter-Day Saints after he died.
"I don't want to spend my time … [Mormon], I'll take my chances in hell – at least they have drugs down there," he said.
With this in mind, Maher questioned why people would listen to the pope and his "giant pointy hat" about the great beyond.
"It's just so f**king stupid that people sit there and are like, ‘Yes, he must know [what happens after death]," he said.
Before discussing the scandal surrounding the Roman Catholic Church and sexually abused children, Maher disclosed that he was raised Catholic. He could see the potential for children to be molested because of what he viewed as a pattern among religious institutions.
"Anytime there is a cult and there are people in pioneer outfits [running around], there is going to be some child-f**king going on," he said. "Anytime there is a guy that says he is God's infallible wingman, lock up the children."
After admitting that he would happily trade the experience of his childhood bullying with gentle masturbation from Michael Jackson, Maher brought his speech to an end.
Upon receiving a standing ovation, Maher provided some wise words to the audience before his departure.
"Kids, take the advice of Bill Maher," he said. "Vaporize, never smoke."
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