I shore don't like this

Let's be honest – MTV has always been better than VH1.
I think it's safe to say that MTV has consistently managed to cause more hype, therefore earning more popularity points.
With shows like For the Love of Ray Jay and Real Chance of Love, VH1 has epically failed at being a good channel. Yet, over the last 10 years or so, MTV has been chasing at the heels of VH1 and done a straight nose-dive into Patheticville, USA. One of their newest addition to its plethora of bogus ‘reality' TV shows has taken the cake. Yes, I mean Jersey Shore.
Don't get me wrong; I enjoy laughing at Snooki doing naked back flips in a bar just as much as the next guy. Heck, I confess. I seriously considered hitting up PURE nightclub on Friday to try and catch a peek of her ‘poof' while she was there. My concern is simply that this is the best MTV can do nowadays.
With the exception of Teen Mom and ABDC, which I have grown unhealthy obsessions for, I find myself now shaking my head at nearly every single show I come across on my once beloved channel. Silent Library, Is She Really going Out with Him, My Life As Liz…really what in the world are the producers of these shows thinking? I guess it's not so fair to blame it all on the makers of these mindless shows, though people in our society are the ones guilty of actually watching it.
I simply can't wrap my head around the idea that watching this nonsense – fist pumping, quirky fake high school tales, d-bag boyfriend turmoil and awkward dares among a room of giggling men – is now considered good television entertainment.
Sure, virtually all entertainment channels have gone downhill in recent years. Pushing the envelope seems to be the new thing, but at what cost? At the rate stations like MTV are going in completely brainwashing society into thinking blowouts, cursing and utter stupidity are cool, I'm going to have to build an underground world in order to raise and shelter my future children from media's corruption.
I know MTV has every right to melt my brain with these lame shows. If we are all going to give them the ratings, why would they cancel the current shows? I also know that I'm capable of getting my lazy butt up to get the remote and change the channel, but it's the principle.
If I overhear one more dead serious conversation among a group of friends about the personal lives of Pauly D and J-Wow, I might jump off the nearest bridge. At first, I fed into the excitement over Jersey Shore because the ridiculous personalities its characters possessed made me feel as though I had an IQ equivalent to Einstein's. I got a kick out of making fun of the bronzed bimbos. But recently, I swear that the people around me are no longer laughing at the antics of the show, but instead are admiring them. Jersey Shore is taking over the world and frankly, it's scaring me a bit.
I mean, look at me. I've devoted an entire column to depict the show. I'm not praising it, but the fact that I'm putting energy into thinking about it just confirms the haunting hypnotizing power these shows have on us all.
It saddens me a bit to realize that a good chunk of my peers don't share the same sentiment and will excitedly continue to pay $25 cover to see attention-whore Tila Tequila and 30-year-old Robin from The Real World do Jagerbombs then dance on top of the bar. Call me crazy but I'll save my $25 for a rainy day.
Give me Animal Planet, give me TLC, shoot even give me a little Lifetime, but I refuse to be a MTV zombie any longer.

E-mail: jennifer.good@ubspectrum.com