Details are beginning to surface regarding the Student Union's 10th birthday party, which took place last semester, on Nov. 12. During the day, the celebration included balloons and cupcakes, but once the lights went out, the party really began.
The Union was then joined by several other campus buildings for a night of drunken debauchery.
"Originally, we were planning on going to Canada for the Union's birthday," said Norton Hall, nicknamed "Snortin' Norton," by fellow campus buildings. "But since the Union isn't 19 years old yet, we figured that idea seemed pretty pointless."
Longtime friend Capen Hall said the buildings were very excited in the weeks leading up to the celebration.
"We were just trying to show the Union a good time," explained the Center for the Arts, who was decked out in a pink polyester suit. "I mean, there are thousands of students who use the Union everyday. I'm sure there's a lot of steam that needs to be blown off."
The Union itself was admittedly unprepared for the night of debauchery.
"My 9th birthday was nothing like this," said the Union. "I was getting ready to call it a night, and all of a sudden (fellow campus building) Jarvis comes up to me with a six-pack of Molson and said, 'your night hasn't even started.'"
"So we pre-gamed until about midnight, then took the shuttle down to South. Apparently there was supposed to be a huge party somewhere on Merrimac," said the Union.
But according to Bell Hall, the buildings arrived too late.
"We finally got to Merrimac, but the kegs were tapped and the party was beginning to break up," Bell. "So we ended up going downtown to Chippewa. From there, I don't remember much."
While most of the North Campus buildings enjoyed their night out, other buildings purposely avoided the party.
Harriman Hall, the "Student Union of South Campus" wanted no part of the Union's birthday celebration.
"This whole birthday thing is just so stupid," said Harriman, who spent the night playing "Madden 2003." "I've been around UB forever, and no one has ever celebrated any of my birthdays."
Although the night proceeded innocently enough at the downtown bars, it rapidly progressed into the realm of more dangerous vices.
"We were having a good time at the bar just drinking and looking for girls," recalls Clemens Hall. "I was in the bathroom of the bar, completely wasted, when all of a sudden Snortin' Norton lines up this powder and blows it up his nose. I was like, 'what the hell?'"
When asked about the reported incident, Norton denied having any memory of drug use in the bar's bathroom.
"But then again, what I don't remember about that night could probably fill a book," said Norton.
While many buildings partied through the night, others celebrated the Union's birthday in a more subdued fashion.
"I went out with the guys for a bit, but I had to get up early the next morning," said Capen Hall. "So I just drank a couple bottles of Smirnoff Ice and came home by 2 a.m."
To the surprise of its friends, the Union went all out for its birthday, staying out until well past 4 a.m.
"It was strange, because I don't normally drink," said the Union. "But my friends told me that I was up on the bar, doing shots of Jagermeister until I passed out."
"Yeah, that was pretty crazy," Clemens said. "I've never seen a 10-year-old drink that much."
After closing the bar, a small number of the buildings went back to campus where they proceeded to drink cans of Genny Light into the wee hours of the morning.
"It was definitely a cool experience," Alumni Arena said. "I've been around here a while, and that was one of the best parties we've ever had. I hope the Union had a good time. Hitting the big 1-0 is a major deal."
"I definitely had a lot of fun," said the Union. "But I paid for it the next morning. I woke up with the worst headache ever. And all the people walking through me all day definitely didn't help."
"It was a wild time," said Fargo Quad. "I went home with some freshman girl, but I never got her number. I think her name was Spaulding."
"Yeah, it got kind of nuts," said the Natural Sciences Center. "But hey, we are the number two party school in the country, right? I just can't wait until next year."
Photo: Courtesy of Laron Fomby
