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Sunday, September 01, 2024
The independent student publication of The University at Buffalo, since 1950

Life with Konze

The hallway showdown

I am a fully alive person. I am always feeling engaged in something, even the simple things in life. There are simple things I notice on a daily basis that make me laugh, frustrate me or make me question the students who were accepted here at UB.

I have been a victim of what I like to call "the hallway showdown" multiple times. This is a common occurrence in my daily routine.

The hallway showdown happens when you are walking down the hallway, on your way to class, and you see someone coming in your direction. You both know you have to make a move so you don't bump into each other.

After much analysis of the situation, however, you both mock each other's every move and end up choreographing an awkward dance that makes you both look stupid while bystanders look on, wondering: 'What the heck is going on?'

Just the other day, I was minding my own business, walking to my 3:30 p.m. class, when I came across a group of students who were walking at an incredibly slow pace - a pace that even the oldest of people could eclipse.

I decided I would not waste any more time with this ridiculousness. I made my way to the left side of the hall, where a drop-dead gorgeous girl met me. She was completely out of my league.

I tried to juke left; I tried to juke right. We just ended up dancing. I'm sure it was the worst minute of her life. It was a very awkward situation.

The only thing I got out of it was an awkward smile. Terrible, right?

The good news is that there is a solution to this awkward situation epidemic, one that keeps the flow of traffic.

The next time this situation arises, stop trying to use football moves to get around your hallway opponent. Just stop, give the person a hug and turn 180 degrees while hugging.

It puts you and the other person both in the direction you want to go, and you did a good deed for the day. Plus, who can't use a little bit of loving these days?

"A study determined that hugs increase levels of oxytocin, a 'bonding' hormone," according to Yahoo.com."Oxytocin is usually released during labor in women and is connected to social recognition, bonding, and building trust. In the hugging couples, they saw reduced levels of cortisol, which increases blood pressure and slows metabolism, which can promote weight gain. So by hugging, you're actually speeding your metabolism."

What more could you ask for? Also, if you are in the presence of someone beautiful, it gives you the chance to 'make a move' and take a chance.

Next time you are in the hall and you come across the hallway showdown, hug it out.

Email: features@ubspectrum.com


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