A study released today by UB's Center for Cognitive Science Research has determined that left-handed people display significantly lower intelligence levels than right-handers.
The study, conducted over a three-year period involving over 5,000 subjects ages 10 to 65, utilized various IQ, reasoning and logic competency tests to determine whether left-handedness affects intelligence.
"We're not trying to say that left-handers are dumb, just that they are dumber than the norm," said the study's founder Dr. Michael Schroeder, who specializes in hand rehabilitation.
On average, the left-handed people who participated in the study scored 40 percent lower on the competency tests than right-handers. These findings come after an MRI study conducted last year that determined left-handers generally have smaller brains than right-handers.
Jason Skidvorski, a junior communication major, is hoping the findings will help raise his GPA.
"I failed two of my midterms, and now I know why," said Skidvorski. "Now that the truth is out about my handicap, I hope my professors will adjust my grades accordingly."
Researchers hope the study will help even the score between righties and lefties, also known as "southpaws."
"We want employers, teachers and authorities to know that lefties are operating on a different level than the rest of the world and should be treated with the same understanding and consideration as any other handicapped or mentally challenged person," said Dr. Peter Sellers, a researcher for the center.
According to Schroeder, a similar study is currently underway that will determine whether the intelligence deficiencies of left-handers are genetic or influenced by society and other external factors.
"We've found now that people who are right-handed, but lose their good hand in accidents or amputations, score lower and lower on IQ tests as they learn to function as a lefty," said Dr. Barbara Struthers, founder of the study and director of the center.
"Once this study is complete, we will know that left-handedness is a treatable condition and the stupidity that comes along with it can be reversed," she said.
Dewpoint Industries, manufacturers of medical supplies, prosthetic limbs and Subaru quarter panels, have already developed and begun preliminary production on an upper body harness that will train children as young as four weeks old to favor their right hands.
Anita and Stanford Lambadome have already purchased one of the prototype harnesses for their daughter, Wendy, who is currently left-handed.
Seventeen-year-old Wendy must wear the harness and clothing specially designed to accommodate it for the next two to three years.
"When she scored a 900 on her PSATs, we were mortified," said Anita Lambadome. "We couldn't figure out what the problem was until we found out about the research being done on lefties. When we learned about Dewpoint's harness we just had to have it. No price was too high for our special little girl."
The Lambadome's paid $3,500 for the harness, but Dewpoint estimates that once it is approved for general sale by the FDA, the retail price will be closer to $3,489.
Wendy has been wearing the harness for seven weeks, but is skeptical about its effectiveness.
"My grades are getting worse because I can't write with my left hand. Even if I know the right answer on a test, my teachers can't understand my writing so they mark the question wrong," said Wendy. "People at school call me 'Harness Corky.' I'd take it off but it's screwed into my arm in eighteen different places.
Though uncomfortable and awkward, Dewpoint representative Simon Manheim asserts the harness effectively limits the motion of the left arm and temporarily paralyzes the left thumb, so that pens, pencils and other utensils cannot be held in the left hand. The patient is thus forced to use their right hand for all major activities.
"With the help of the new findings in this study and the harness, we can prevent the devastation that stems from being a lefty," said Schroeder. "With hard work, 100 years from now southpaws may be a freak legend of the past."
Hugh "Lefty" Johnson, a sophomore economics major, strongly disagrees with the study's findings.
"I been a lefty all my life an I ain't never been no dummy," said Johnson. "An if you say again that I's an idiot, I's gonna take my left hand here punch your mouth in."
Early reports are also tentatively confirming that an unusually high percentage of prison inmates are left-handed. The university research centers are looking into these reports and the possibility that lefties may be more prone to criminal activity and outbursts resulting in physical assault.
