You've got two glow sticks, a pacifier, gum, water, Vick's (vapo-rub and inhaler), pockets full of lollipops and two pills. It's two hours until show time up in Toronto, and you're anticipating the biggest night of your life. Or is it just a bunch of nonsense?
Waiting in line amongst your so-called "best friends" in the minus-10 degree weather, your excitement grows. Only $20 at the door to get in and you're almost on your way. Forty minutes or so after you drop your first pill, the "rush" hits you! Ahhh ... the lights, the music, the touch! All your senses multiplied. You're empathetic, kind and generous. It's complete euphoria!
You dance, you talk (a lot), make friends with complete strangers, tell people your life story and how much you "love" them, and geez, you just can't stop looking at your sexy self in the bathroom mirror every five minutes.
It's now 4 a.m., and the high is sort of wearing off. You take your other pill. Oh wow! Intense! Repeat all the activities mentioned above. This is awesome!
Eight a.m. rolls (no pun intended) around and reality starts to resurface. You step outside the rave, and, oh no, sunlight! The drive home seems dreamlike as you try to piece together what exactly just happened for the past 10 hours. You take a look at your friends in the passenger seats and they too have the same blank stares on their faces.
Arriving at your house ... finally, home! Lying in bed you try to fall asleep, but you just can't. You're physically, mentally, and emotionally tired, yet all you can do is stare at the ceiling. The thought ponders, "Wow, what a great night!" Then all of a sudden, you're hit with another rush. This time it's not too euphoric as the one earlier in the night. In fact, it's quite the opposite. Depression.
You finally fall asleep and wake up later that night. Your whole day is gone and the depression is still there. It stays with you for the next few days. By mid-week, you're getting back to work or school and reality is starting to kick in again. Swearing off the drug entirely just two days ago, you start to think, "Well, maybe just one more time."
Friday comes, and hey, why not? It's the weekend! Another night of rollin', the high not as intense as last weekend, but not bad. Then, the depression again. You repeat this process over and over, and now it's to the point where your only happiness in life, the only thing that will make you feel remotely okay, is this little pill.
All those so-called friends you made at all the parties, they're not your friends. You get their numbers, but never call them. They only thing you have in common is you "live for" ecstasy. You still like the trance, drum 'n' bass, house, and all the techno. Though, it really sounds the best if you're rollin'.
You try to go on living a "normal" fulfilling life, but all that seems to matter is, "When is the next time I get to eat a pill?"
In the 1970s, when ecstasy hit the disco scene, it was recommended, "Once you get the message, hang up the phone." This implied after you've tried ecstasy, take what you've learned from your experience and apply it to your life. Do not keep using.
What about the long-term effects of ecstasy on your brain? No one knows the answers for sure. According to Time Magazine, "The rush of serotonin may cause damage to the ends of axons. Most studies suggest that nerve endings die off but some indicate that they may grow back, although abnormally. These axons may return in denser formation, and may no longer reach the areas of the brain in which they are needed."
Now you're possibly messing around with damaging your brain for good, not to mention the constant physical tiredness and unending depression. Aside from all of that though, you've created this false reality where ecstasy is your life. Hey, I'll admit, it's an awesome feeling that ecstasy produces. But should anything really be that good?
