"Girls, Girls, Girls"



You can catch them almost anywhere on campus, except probably the men's locker room. Well, on occasion you might spot a couple in there. But girls are everywhere in different shapes and sizes. Some come with accessories, some don't. There is a wide variety at our beloved school. The best place to find them is probably the Student Union. I tend to like the ones I see in the library; they seem to be a little more intelligent.

One thing no one can deny about our university is the wide variety of girls. You have those who dress up everyday like they're going to a club. There are those who are a little more focused on their schoolwork; most of the time they just slip on sweats. We have those girls who are gassed, probably because they got the full service from Mobil, Sunoco, or some guy who was just wanted to put her on his list. There is the type of girl that actually looks good but is very humble and not conceited in the least. This type of girl is a keeper.

There are girls with reputations shadowed by things they did during past semesters, but come back the next year acting brand new. You can't just leave in the summer, come back in the fall with a new conservative wardrobe and expect a clean slate. Maybe freshmen or transfer students do not know your "social resume," but the continuing male student body most likely knows in more than one way. And speaking of freshmen, stop thinking that you're God's gift if an upperclassmen tries to talk to you. I will clue you in on something: your naivety is what attracts them.

But getting back to the variety of girls on campus. Those who can cook are definitely keepers. However, those who don't cook but use food in different ways might be keepers too. We cannot forget girls who get drunk the night before at a bar or club, and then are back on their knees the next morning in church acting as if nothing happened.

Don't forget about the girls who have all the book smarts in the world but no common sense. We have the chicks that watch too many music videos, imitating the styles they see the stars don. Everybody is not going to be able to wear braids like Alicia Keys. Don't forget about the girls with food stamp faces and million dollar bodies. What a waste!

Love to all the girls with a little extra something to grab onto, but some girls here take the thick thing a little too far. Then you have girls who are so cool that you sometimes forget they're girls. You also have the Destiny's Child-type girls who are independent. Can't forget about the thirsty girls who will sit by the bar until some guy buys them a drink.

To the girls reading this, you may fall into one of these categories or you may be in a category all to yourself. This piece was not meant to offend anyone. It was simply meant to extinguish the notions there isn't a large variety of girls at our school.