Office Space? I’ll take Office Sex, Thanks
Published: Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Updated: Monday, November 5, 2012 19:11
It’s just past 5 p.m. and the workday is coming to an end. Students are going back to their dorm rooms or apartments – maybe to spend time with a significant other or relax after a long day. Not you. You hang back, telling everyone that it will be a long night because you have too much work to do. You wait impatiently until you’re alone.
But once that last co-worker leaves, you throw all of your pretensions out the window and make that call – to your boyfriend, your girlfriend, or maybe just that “special” friend.
That’s when the fun starts.
Clothes fall to the floor, papers get swiped off the desk, and you get hoisted onto the table in the conference room.
You know it’s wrong, but it feels so right.
There’s just something about having sex in a forbidden place that makes it more exhilarating. It’s one of those forbidden acts that you fantasize about, hoping to check off your bucket list.
There’s a saying that goes: “don’t dip your pen in company ink,” which is almost always respectable advice. Hooking up with a co-worker usually ends poorly, especially when your co-workers are college students with raging hormones who love to gossip. But hooking up in an office doesn’t have to be with someone you work with, although it might seem more convenient that way.
If you’re good at keeping quiet about your love life, then having sex at work is one of the best dirty little secrets you can keep.
There are a few things to keep in mind when you want to hook up in your workplace.
Make sure you’re alone. You don’t want to tear each other’s clothes off, only to find a co-worker who was there the entire time, mouth wide open.
Lock the doors. If someone does have keys to get into the office, do the deed where you are hidden from anyone who may burst through the door mid-hookup. While it might be a sexy fantasy of yours, your co-workers might not be pleased to find the table they eat at every day was once home to your bare bottom.
Clean up. Do everyone a favor, and for hygiene’s sake, clean up after yourself. The sexy appeal of hooking up where people hold their morning meetings will still be there after giving the area a good scrub.
Of course this doesn’t apply if you work in a restaurant or anywhere near food. In that case, do not let any of your bodily fluids near something someone might potentially eat.
The best part of hooking up at work is that it’s a secret that only two people – or three, if you’re into that sort of thing – share. Don’t tell anyone else you work with because you risk it getting out to the entire office. Not only is that horrible for your reputation, and something that could get you in a lot of trouble, but it also ruins the appeal of getting away with something that is against the rules.
It’s like having sex in a public place: there’s the rush of adrenaline you get when you can get caught any moment and the feeling of satisfaction when you don’t.
If you’re looking to have passionate, naughty sex in a public place, an office environment is a good place to do so. Keep in mind, however, that there are consequences – personal and professional – if you get caught.
But that’s part of the fun, isn’t it?