Say Yes to the Dress, Four Weddings and David Tutera's My Fair Wedding all have one thing in common: fairytale weddings. If you're a wedding show fanatic like me, I'm sure these names look all too familiar.
You all know the infamous story: guy chases girl, sweeps her off her feet and, as the childhood rhyme goes, "first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby and the baby carriage."
We've heard that rhyme a million times, except we never really took it seriously unless we were playing house.
What if all this talk about weddings and finding you prince charming is a lie?
Where is it written that we will find "the one" or even get married?
I'm no psychologist, but to me, the whole idea of finding "the one" and getting married is just our hearts dreaming out loud. We end up fooling ourselves into believing finding true love and getting married is supposed to happen and if it doesn't, then something is wrong with us.
For example, I've never been on a real date where I was wined and dined. The only dates I remember being on are the ones where I end up picking up the tab. From the movies to the food to even picking up the guy because of "car trouble," I've done it all.
College was a new chapter for me, and like most typical college freshmen, I was single and ready to mingle.
From house parties to clubs, you spend your first year searching for someone to occupy your time and possibly become that special someone in the long run. Sometimes it works out, but most of the time, there is no end to the search.
For me, my wake-up call in life and love began the summer after my sophomore year. That summer, I met Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome and the fairytale dream was starting to make its way into my life for the umpteenth time.
You all know the feeling: everything was perfect, but unfortunately, like any other summer fling, it had to come to an end because fall semester was right around the corner.
But we let it continue for nine months before reality hit.
I found out his ex-girlfriend was still in the picture all along.
My heart sank to the pit of my stomach. Every memory was tarnished and every minute spent was wasted. I was a placeholder to him - a bench warmer.
You all know the feeling of losing someone that meant the world to you. That feeling of emptiness is the worst feeling to mankind and letting go could be the hardest you'll ever have to do.
Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome and I had become strangers who departed from what once was to understanding what once was will never be.
You tend to let yourself fall deep with no harness, no parachute, nothing to save you. Sounds like something a fool would do, but in the matters of the heart, we never seem to see the true light until it hits us. From there, we have a choice to either live a lie or accept reality.
Now when I spend my Friday afternoons poring over wedding dresses I'll probably never get to wear or picking out wedding colors I'll probably never get use, I can't help but think, "How crazy I am for planning and dreaming about a day that may never happen?"
Sometimes in life, you spend all of your time chasing after things you're not certain of and pay the price when things hit the fan. We believe in things like love, marriage and finding "the one" with no assurance of their existence.
I may be wrong.
There may be some truth to these fairytale dreams, and you may find the one and have David Tutera plan your dream wedding. Sadly, not everyone will get to experience that, but there is a silver lining.
You may never find your prince charming or "the one", but if you look closely you might have found something even better through the chaos.
You may end up finding yourself.
I know I found my strengths, my weakness and most importantly my worth. Something I never plan on losing.
So as the journey towards love continues, so will my glass slippers and my ball gown dress - whether it's to the alter or to a fairytale wedding in my dreams, I'll be there.
Email: adiallo3@buffalo.edu
